I meant to start blogging again this Lent. I find myself still in a funk. I watch with anxiety the divisions within the Church. I don’t see Francis acting like Peter defending the Church. Rather, he seems to be the promoter of dissent. I know some people would say that I am casting stones but I cannot help but wonder who the puppetmaster is behind the puppets? Perhaps many are right, he is just being a Jesuit. That doesn’t help me, a graduate of a Jesuit college. They ruined more people’s faith lives than I can possibly count at my college. We did all receive a wonderful education that has helped us in the secular world. We were left unprepared for the real battles of the world. So I don’t have much hope. I do have hope in the Lord. He never fails us even when we cannot fathom why we are in this place where Archbishops and Cardinals in Germany blackmail with threats of seceding from Rome – they are not a subsidiary! No, they are just supposed to be in communion with all of us. Communion is the fight – let’s give communion to everyone. Not a bad thought, merciful, none of us are deserving. But that’s not the point. The Lord’s words are being thrown out. They are actually being thrown in our faces and the end result will be no one cares about anything. The church will have given away its treasure in one pastoral act that actually mocks the master, not fulfill His words. (Other disruptions – the Rosica Affair, the Pell affair, the 5 cardinal book affair….)
And so, I ask that you pray for me that I might not despair. I pray for Francis that he will be Peter. I don’t think Francis is wrong about his social message! When he talked to his priests the other day, I think he revealed something important. He doesn’t act thinking about being in the presence of the Lord when he thinks. He is impulsive. So, my prayer for Francis is that he actually become more spiritually mature and less reliant on his own brand of spirituality. I pray for the world. I pray for the Church. But, I feel weak, insecure, unsure, on the verge of giving up, on the verge of not trying, on the verge of …. Pray for me please.
Mary, Most Holy – please pray for us. It really is in your hands.